Yet Another Cryptid

Newsflash: There’s Lot of Animals in Wisconsin! Some Are in Pretty Bad Shape!

On his drives throughout the county, Juneau County highway worker Jeff Potter said he comes across countless dead wildlife. But he said he’s never come across anything quite like the creature he found dead along Highway 71 in the city of Elroy on Monday morning.

“It’s completely hairless — almost like leather,” Potter said. “It has a canine-like head and a fox- or dog-type head. The rear legs are coon-like. The tail is almost like an opossum.”

Potter, who is an avid hunter and outdoorsman, was left speechless.

Yeah, thank god for that.

So, we have reached the age in which every hairless diseased animal that gets run over by a drunk redneck’s truck is immediately identified as a cryptozoological marvel. Talk about boring. What ever happened to the glory days of pickled punks and fuzzy 8mm footage of fat men in fuzzy pantyhose? Hell, even crudely stamped out foot prints are more interesting than this crap. While you’re at it, why don’t you just turn on the night vision off your Wal-Mart camera and run through the fucking woods pissing yourself all the way. You could claim you were posessed by the spirit of whatever deformed squirrel-monkey you ran over on the way to the kegger.

Explore posts in the same categories: Confused Thinking, cryptozoology

2 Comments on “Yet Another Cryptid”

  1. susej Says:

    Aw,man,my comments don’t fit here so good like they would @ the other old heretical site. I was talkin ‘bouut hair, lotsa hair! Looksee:

    Whoowee! What mildly incensed hatred…we must have all blasphemed the Holy Ghost:the host 4 being so heretical as stated; Betsy 4 daring 2 encroach in spite of the disclaimer…what disclaimer? I didn’t see any warning THAT my entry constituted blasphemy in spite of my failure2 see it. Ignorance of the law is no excuse, THAT’s why when He comes He shall apply THAT principle 2 the scoffers. It’s all cool&in good fun. It’s a fun cite like The fun center MKB visited in “A Devine Revelation of Hell.”
    I hope u all read my book if IAM ever able2 go into print;don’t know why He would find it necessary 2 want2 considering He is God & therefore doesn’t have2. Aw, well alas this Berry! Have a nice life & afterlife2 if u believe in One. I do. Don’t be so upset, after all it’s still America so far 4A little while yet. Bye!

  2. Collin Says:

    It’s just a very overweight opossum. What he should be worried about is what the heck has it been eating?!?

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