Archive for the ‘cryptozoology’ category

Bigfoot DNA to be Tested

May 26, 2012

Well, alleged Bigfoot DNA.

“I’m challenging and inviting the cryptozoologists to come up with the evidence instead of complaining that science is rejecting what they have to say,” [Geneticist Bryan] Sykes told Discovery News.

People with evidence of Bigfoot, including hair, skin, or teeth samples, are urged to send a description of their items and photos to the researchers.Sykes and his team will then ask to sample the most promising evidence, and compile a full DNA profile for each of the samples.

And, of course, we all know that this will settle the case once and for all. No more claims that Bigfoot is from another dimension or lives in a UFO. Or … is bionic.

Lake Monster Footage?

February 13, 2012

This footage was taken by a vidographer in Iceland, an it seems to have the whole country excited.

Looks like the water movement at the edge of an ice sheet to me. Sure, it’s got a cool serpentine look to it, but doesn’t look like it’s any sort of living animal.

New input from an article by Alan Boyle

The snaky thing looks as if it’s swimming upstream because water is streaming past it. It’s the moving water that creates the illusion of a swimming snake.


Any way, since I’m on to the subject of ice:


February 10, 2012

Look, a mammoth/bear!

Of course the funniest thing about this video is how it’s so short. If I saw a woolly mammoth, I would run up to it until it trampled me!


In the Shark Eye of the Beholder

August 29, 2011

This mysterious animal was reportedly caught off the Sea of Cortez. And it is, off course, baffling scientists, as the old addage goes. Amusingly, it has been dubbed “Cycloptomus”

Cute little fellow. He reminds of the large talking eyeball in Monster’s Inc.

So, is this a cryptozoological find, a random mutation, of a hoax? Beats me. I know nothing about sharks, other than what I’ve seen on the Discovery Channel (Shark Week really has Jumped the Shark, hasn’t it?), but cycloptic mutations do happen. Unfortunately, the deformations involved often prove to be fatal to the animal. And this little guy was dead when found. But, I do think it’s a bit odd that this eye looks very little like a shark eye.

Jeff Rotman/Getty Images

And an awful lot like a molded plastic novelty human eye

Just sayin’.

One way or the other, it sure is cute, isn’t it?

Yet Another Cryptid

August 2, 2011

Newsflash: There’s Lot of Animals in Wisconsin! Some Are in Pretty Bad Shape!

On his drives throughout the county, Juneau County highway worker Jeff Potter said he comes across countless dead wildlife. But he said he’s never come across anything quite like the creature he found dead along Highway 71 in the city of Elroy on Monday morning.

“It’s completely hairless — almost like leather,” Potter said. “It has a canine-like head and a fox- or dog-type head. The rear legs are coon-like. The tail is almost like an opossum.”

Potter, who is an avid hunter and outdoorsman, was left speechless.

Yeah, thank god for that.

So, we have reached the age in which every hairless diseased animal that gets run over by a drunk redneck’s truck is immediately identified as a cryptozoological marvel. Talk about boring. What ever happened to the glory days of pickled punks and fuzzy 8mm footage of fat men in fuzzy pantyhose? Hell, even crudely stamped out foot prints are more interesting than this crap. While you’re at it, why don’t you just turn on the night vision off your Wal-Mart camera and run through the fucking woods pissing yourself all the way. You could claim you were posessed by the spirit of whatever deformed squirrel-monkey you ran over on the way to the kegger.